Welcome!
I’m so glad you’re here.
If I had a dollar for every time someone has told me, “you really should write a book”, I could almost retire. Well, maybe not quite yet, but at least take a really nice vacation! I’m not ready to write a book, but after the last few (checks notes: actually, 10) years of managing a growing career, side business, family, and just plain life (throw in a pandemic, a move, growing family, health challenges, the list goes on), honestly, I just hit a wall. Like a little smart car going 60 miles an hour that hits a cement wall and just crumples up and the test driver stumbles out of it…yah, that was me. For the record, I am okay and am incredibly lucky to have such supportive people in my life, including an excellent therapist. Somewhere along the way of a 14 year relationship turned marriage, adding kids into the mix and parenting, and a growing career, I found myself a little bit like Alice in Wonderland. That’s one of my favorite classic books and I love the scene where the Mad Hatter tells Alice, “You’re not the same as you were before. You were much more…muchier. You’ve lost your muchness.” About a year ago, I realized with startling clarity that I had lost a lot of my “muchness”. And then immediately put that realization in a box and shoved it sideways in my brain. Sidenote: I 100% do not recommend that “strategy”. It’s much healthier albeit harder to sit with the uncomfortable thought that you’ve indeed lost (however temporarily) your sparkle and muchness. Part of how I knew I was burned out was that I stopped writing and posting on LinkedIn and for my consulting work. I also doubled down on my efforts at work and even moved into a new role and into executive leadership (see, look at me, I’m FINE!)…and realized that if I’m struggling to manage the chaos and surviving on coffee, maybe other people are too.
What’s a Person To Do?
Just Chaos!
One of the saving graces throughout my life during challenging times has always been writing. Like many people, and women specifically, in the last 5 years, I’ve been in and around burnout so much it took me about a year to realize, oh crap, I’m like really, actually Burned. Out. Disclaimer: I do not have any magical fixes. I do not have any quick fixes because I’m still trying to figure my own way out of crispy-ness and into, well, un-crispy, I suppose. What I do know is that writing helps and I love to help other people, specifically women. So here we go…welcome to my corner of the internet, Just Chaos and Coffee!
You may be wondering why I chose the name, “Just Chaos and Coffee” and it’s very simple. In my world, chaos doesn’t equal bad or negative. It just means there is always a ton of stuff going on at the same time. 100 work projects in flight, a rotation of suuuuuper fun elementary school viruses on parade through our house with kids, two successful career building adults, one business and venturing into another…oh, and it’s gardening season which is my “self-care” (more on that later)...I found myself saying more and more often, “It’s Just Chaos”. For me, I’ve come to some sort of peace with the chaos in the sense that this is the season of my life and it’s okay. Coffee, as you’ll quickly realize, is life around here for me. I am that friend who is always up for a visit to a coffee shop; I am that Mom who the kids know to not ask to play before I’ve had my coffee; I am that lady who now reluctantly and only because it is supposedly good for me, will drink exactly 8 oz of water WHILE my coffee is brewing. Coffee = life and brain power. Just Chaos and Coffee describes my life in 4 beautiful, complex words.
A Bit About Me
I’m an “elder millennial” who is a wife to a guy built like a linebacker, but plays really great golf, works hard for his family, and who I’m just such a fan of. There hasn’t been a business idea of mine that he has not whole-heartedly supported and I know I’m the luckiest lady around to have him in my corner when the hits of life keep coming.
I’m a mom to two really amazing kids (who also 100% drive me nuts and no, that doesn’t diminish my love for them, Nancy. We will only be real over here.) and they bring about 65% of the chaos on any given day. For example, my daughter within 10 seconds of waking up one morning recently told me “Mommy, the rolly polies are back and so are the worms, but not the snails. So that’s good. But we can’t pick our noses.” THIS IS ALL AT 6:15 in the ACTUAL MORNING. While my coffee is brewing and our son is belting out burps in the kitchen. I have so many questions and am glad she knows we shouldn’t pick our noses. Maybe one day the burps and fart noises will stop? See what I mean, just chaos.
I’m also one of the parents in the “sandwich generation” where I’m still parenting my own kids and find myself in this changing dynamic with my parents as they’re aging and some days that brings another level of chaos, even from 1,800 miles away. On top of all that, I am an executive level leader at a behavioral health hospital…oh, and run my own training & consulting business and now write for Just Chaos and Coffee. It’s fine. Everything’s fine.
I truly wouldn’t change it.
Five Things You Need to Know About Me
JoEllen in her natural element - laughing while drinking coffee.
Photo by Alicia Leigh Photography
Maybe you’re like me, looking for a bit of humor and community amongst all the spicy dumpster fires on the internet right now. I can tell you 5 things for sure:
All are welcome here. Truly. As you hear more of my story, you will understand why this is so important to me and my family. While I think much of my writings will resonate with women who work and/or parent, all humans who are trying their best and who are kind are welcome around here.
While I’d like to think I’ve gained some hard earned wisdom along the way, the reality is, I don’t have all the answers. I ask a LOT of questions in the work that I do and that’s part of what makes me really good at my job(s). This isn’t the place for all the answers, but it is the place to hopefully gain some perspective that can help you in your own journey.
I’m the biggest hype woman out there. Honestly. Especially for other women leaders and women running their own businesses. Need some encouragement and a dose of authenticity? You’ve come to the right place.
There will always be coffee. Like, ALWAYS. I am a multiple cup of coffee a day person and no health advice will ever deter me from that. I love the smell of it, the feel of the warm cup in my hands, the atmosphere of coffee shops…all of it. I love it! You’ll get to read about and see some of the amazing local shops I’ve found!
There will be chaos. It’s guaranteed. We’ll always figure a way out of the chaos (one way or another) and my hope is that you’ll feel not so alone in your own chaos.
Grab a cup of your favorite whatever, pull up a chair, and stay awhile.
I’m so glad you’re here.
JoEllen